I married a man with the most selective hearing EVER.
The doctor’s appointment did not go as well as I had hoped. For starters, the doctor was a full HOUR late. Not even in the building; he was across the street polishing off a vasectomy reversal. This, of course, made Miguel BATSHIT. He hates to be kept waiting on a good day; when he’s worried about every second away from his new job, it’s even worse.
So we both met with the doctor and I have to say that I do not have a great deal of confidence in him. Understandably, he was flustered from running behind, but he just seemed kind of stuttery and unfocused. Basically, what he said was that based on the one test result, it was hard to say if there was a problem. All ejaculations are different (hee, I almost giggled when he said that, I am 10), and one bad test result did not mean necessarily that anything was wrong. And really, the critical morphology results that were the most dire are really narrow and overly strict are developed for IVF. To which I wanted to say, “if there’s no problem and it was one bad test result, then why am I not pregnant GENIUS?”
So he did the physical exam, and after, I had hoped to go back in and discuss his findings and also talk about what lifestyle factors i.e., drinking, could be affecting his counts. But when the doctor is an hour behind, that is not going to be happening.
So Miguel came strolling out, happy as a clam and said that the physical exam was fine, so there was no need to worry about his football injury affecting anything. The doctor said the most telling thing was that we’d had a pregnancy before so not to base anything on those test results. Oh, and also, he said that drinking beer has nothing to do with it; don’t believe all that stuff that you read. And based on the regular morphology, we’d have just fine a chance with insemination (you know, instead of the 10-12% chance the reproductive endocrinologist quoted). None of which gets us any closer to answering the question, “Why aren’t I pregnant?”.
I had to clarify the lab orders for the second test (whether or not we could use the same lab we originally used), so I called the doctor back and said that I had some more questions. When he called me back he was short and basically said that he wasn’t going to make any recommendations until he saw repeated test results.
What I heard: There’s no major physical abnormality; we won’t know anything until we get more test results.
What Miguel heard: Test results, schmest results, you can get pregnant no problem, have a beer!
So while Miguel is happily sunning himself on the river denial, sipping on a corona, there is no point in arguing with him. I’ll just have to wait for the next tests results to come in and be just as sucky as the first before he will admit there is a problem.
God DAMN God DAMN. I just called to make the appointment for the follow up test and they’re only at the lab by us ONE day a week, and not even that next week. I can’t get him an appointment until the 3rd of July. And not until 8, even though they open at 7, so he is going to be late for work. The lab we used last time gives Saturday appointments, but not until Friday afternoon and only IF the appointment times don’t fill up with IVF patients.
So we are looking at another 3 fucking weeks before we can do a god damn thing. There goes another month’s ovulation. It will be the 12th of never before we can get pregnant. Why didn’t the reproductive endocrinologist send us for a second test in preparation for the urologist? He said he knew they were going to want a second one. Why didn’t the fucking urologist check how many tests we’d had when we made the appointment so he’d have two tests to look at from the fucking get go if he wasn’t going to do anything but feel up Miguel’s nuts at the first appointment without it? And once the test are done, we’ll have to wait several days to a week for another appointment to discuss the results. Every appointment where you hope you’re going to get some answers and start taking action is just leading to another appointment and another test.