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Beautiful September 28, 2007

Filed under: ?Baby? — booksunread @ 1:28 pm

Surprise, surprise; all that worrying about the ultrasound for nothing. I have three mature follicles ripe and ready for IUI on Saturday. The doctor’s exact words were “beautiful.”  And that was about all he had to say; he was in and out of the room in about 5 minutes flat.  Okay, then.

I gave myself my shot last night; they time it much more loosely than the last clinic; it just had to be between 6 and 8.  It went easier this time around, probably because we had somewhere to be and I didn’t have time to screw around, I just had to do it and go. 

So hopefully this cycle will be successful and I can put my time as an “infertile” behind me.  I was thinking about that term yesterday, and I realized that throughout this whole process, I’ve never really applied that label to myself.  I was thinking about a post to ask how other “infertiles” deal with it when someone you know announces her pregnancy.

And as I was mentally composing the post; I realized that I had included myself under that label for the first time.  Sure, we’re fertility challenged, I’ve always thought, but we’re not like those other couples.  We don’t have massively dismal medical histories with complications on both sides, we’re just straight low sperm.  And yet, here we are months later, still not pregnant all the same. Just like those “infertiles”.  And while I hope like hell this cycle is successful, I’m starting to face the fact that we may never get pregnant, and will indeed, be infertile. 

Okay, I’ve typed it so many times this post that “infertile” is going the way of “tartlet” and has started to loose all meaning.

So to circle back to my original point, I guess I have two questions for any readers out there having trouble conceiving.  1. Do you consider yourself infertile, or tell yourself you’re just having a little trouble?  and 2. How do you deal with it when a friend or acquaintance turns up pregnant?  Because I have one friend who recently announced an upcoming birth, and another one who I suspect might be. 

The one who might be is just far more awkward, she lives here in town and we see each other quite a bit so I’ll have a front row seat to the whole event.  And she knows that we are having trouble, so I’m sure she feels awkward and weird about telling me too.   I mean, I irrationally think pissy, petty things when I see a stranger who is pregnant (and do not even get me started on Nicole Richie’s anorexic spawn) so I don’t know how I’m going to keep it from continually eating at me.

So really, if any of you out there reading have been through this, please delurk and leave a comment sharing your experiences.

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2 Responses to “Beautiful”

  1. salsera Says:

    oh sweetie YOU are NOT infertile, Miguel is!!!! you can have babies all the live long day! its really not supposed to work so great that you can easily get pregnant every cycle – otherwise the world would be way overcrowded – unless you are the Duggars and god says you get to be pregnant all the time.

  2. booksunread Says:

    well, as a couple, we are. meh. whatever.


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