Books Unread, Jokes Untold-the pursuit of life

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Ho Ho Ho! (for real) December 21, 2007

Filed under: Pregnancy — booksunread @ 6:54 pm

Okay, I’m officially in the holiday mood now.  I’ve got t-minus 2.5 hours before the work day is over. I busted ass yesterday to get a bunch of stuff out before the holiday exodus began, so now I’m just kind of hanging out, not much to do.  Except plan my next fiscal year budget…woo?  Plenty of time for that the two half days I’m working next week!

I’m getting very excited as we leave tonight for home and will be making the big announcement about the WB (wee baby) to the families tomorrow.  We had an awesome OB appointment yesterday with WB dancing and jiggling across the ultrasound screen.  I also got to hear the heartbeat, which is great for this early, albeit a little sporadically as WB was still running around in there and the nurse had to keep moving the Doppler. 

Now, I finally feel a little bit of an exhale. We’re in the final stretch of the 1st trimester and knock on wood, with all the ultrasounds we’ve had at this point, I feel pretty confident in telling people.  In the new year, I will be a week shy of the 2nd trimester and plan to break the news at work.

For the big family announcement my original plan was to bake some bootie or little baby feet cookies, bring them along with my usual Christmas baking and be all, “hey, I made special cookies this year, want to see?”  But then I saw this cute “expecting” t-shirt and I thought, “wearing a t-shirt is a crapload easier than baking and frosting cookies!”  Thus the sly, ‘I’ll just wear this t-shirt and see how long it takes them to notice’ plan was born.

Salsera found me this all kinds of adorable t-shirt:

baby T

I ordered it Monday and it arrived today.  It is cute and perfect and I’m squeeing all over myself just looking at it.  I can’t wait to put it on tomorrow.  I must say, the service (speedy delivery, and she called to verify I knew I hadn’t ordered a maternity shirt) and final product were outstanding.  I fully recommend to anyone looking for a cute gift for a new mom to be or yourself! Link

I’m really looking forward to a happy and exciting holiday.  I hope that everyone else enjoys the same!


Bucking for a Lump of Coal (Or a Kick in the Nuts) December 19, 2007

Filed under: Pregnancy — booksunread @ 2:29 pm

Little primer for you guys, things you do not say to your pregnant wife:


When she comes home with new panties in a slightly larger size…
With furrowed brow, “Wow, those are really big…are you going to get that big?”
Especially when she is pretty sure that they will fit her ass NOW.


When she is wistfully wishing she could go back to bed in the morning instead of getting ready for work because she is so. damn. tired…
With disgustingly cheerful morning pep, “It’s not all being pregnant. You never like getting up in the morning.  Getting up in the morning is all mental, if you’d just buck up and stop being such a grouch, you wouldn’t be as tired.”


When she is two seconds away from walking out the door to work…
Running hands over her hips, “These pants are getting really tight!”
Backtracking in face of death ray glare, “You’re pregnant…so it’s okay!”
Nice try. My ass is not pregnant, thank you very much, so tell me another one.


Ho Ho…blah December 17, 2007

Filed under: Daily Grind — booksunread @ 1:58 pm

I am so having a hard time with the Christmas spirit this year.  It doesn’t help that this year Miguel is over the moon about Christmas (he’s always been a huge fan of the holiday, but this year when he loves his job and is excited about the baby, he is borderline annoying).  But it’s hard for me to live up to that level of enthusiasm when I feel like something that is stuck to the bottom of his shoe.

Back in the day, when we were still trying to get pregnant, I promised myself that if/when we got pregnant, I would not complain about the process of being pregnant at all.  Nay! I would welcome each barfy morning with a smile and song because, after all, this is what I wanted so bad. 

But man, do I feel like hammered shit most days.  Unfortunately, I’ve never been a good barfer, so I’ve not had any actual barfing yet.  Which, if I did barf, maybe I could get it out of my system and feel better.  Instead, I have this gross, acid-y gassy feeling riding around with me all day, from morning to night.  It’s like a huge bubble is trapped between my stomach and my throat and it is going neither up nor down.

The one safe remedy I thought I’d found, now that my beloved alka seltzer is on the no no list (it’s like Drano, for your stomach!-TM Salsera) was shot down by the nurse midwife last week.  I thought, surely if alka seltzer is out because it contains aspirin, then regular plain old baking soda should be just fine.  It has the similar effect of going down there and breaking up the huge bubble of misery compressing your diaphragm.  A couple of huge belches later and you feel like a person again.

Unfortunately, the NMW shook her head and gravely pronounced “too much sodium,” when I revealed my stroke of brilliance.  She suggested an Rx for Ranitidine instead.  I don’t really understand how taking a synthetic Rx on a daily basis could possibly be better for me than occasionally ingesting extra salt as I treat symptoms only when I need it…I’m seeing the other NMW this week and I’m going to ask her that very question.  Because I tossed and turned for an hour and a half after lights out last night, praying for a giant burp or fart to come along and relieve some of the pressure building up in my stomach.

So, when I’m feeling all crappy like that, I’m not very much in the mood to make merry…or even be very nice.  I was rather cranky pants this weekend as I tried to get my holiday baking and the rest of my gift shopping and wrapping done.  Friday night, I went to Kohl’s to get the nieces and nephews done. And spent over 30 minutes just standing in line.  Then I went to Kroger where the fuckers were out of three of the major key ingredients I needed.  Who runs out of confectioner’s sugar the week before Christmas?  Ditto the Drug Mart I stopped at on my way home.  There must have been some crazy run on confectioner’s sugar. Maybe people were stocking up for the snow storm? Bread, milk, powdered sugar, check.

The entire weekend was like that.  No single store had everything I planned to pick up that trip. I always had to make another stop, and in two cases, the store I needed to go to WASN’T open on Sunday.  I even got foiled online shopping for the love of pete.  The Bed Bath and Beyond website crapped out on me, not once, but twice, as I was trying to place my order. 

I have one more gift to buy and wrap, then I can pack up and ship off Salsera’s box.  I have two more gifts to pick up for Miguel, and about a half dozen more still to wrap.  And oh yeah, I still have to do Christmas cards.  I am planning to send them out late anyway, because I’m going to use the opportunity to tell the extended friends and family about le bebe. And obviously I couldn’t mail those out until we’ve told our immediate family.  However, the thought of writing out all those cards makes the baby jesus cry.  I’m considering pasting a typewritten message re: the baby into the inside of each card, in lieu of the same handwritten note over and over again…is that wrong?


Scary December 11, 2007

Filed under: ?Baby? — booksunread @ 12:47 pm

So yesterday was a very traumatic day.  I went in to my OB and saw the nurse midwife.  I described the very light spotting I’d had over the weekend, and she said she was really not worried based on that description.  A quick check under the hood and she said everything looked good. 

And then we decided to do an ultrasound scan “just for reassurance.”  She was taking an inordinately long time with the wand and the machine.  They didn’t have an ultrasound tech there yesterday, so she was running the machine herself. 

Finally I mustered up the courage to ask “Can you still see the heartbeat?” And she replied, “I have to be honest with you, I can’t.  I’m trying to get a better angle, I can see the cords and everything going in, but I can’t definitively see the heartbeat.”

I have never felt so terrible in my life.  I felt like somebody had sucked all the air out of me. I felt like I should be crying, but all I was managing were these dry gasps for air.  She wanted to send me to the perinatal center at the hospital for another ultrasound, to make sure.  She said that it could just be the angle that she was getting, and they could tell more with the equipment they had. But she looked worried. 

The perinatal center couldn’t get me in until 1:30, it was now 10:30.  I couldn’t imagine what I would do with myself for the intervening 3 hours. Go back to work?  Go home and sob?  The nurse recommended I try my reproductive endocrinologist, explain what was going on and see if they could get me in sooner.

I called and calmly explained what was going on and the receptionist put me on hold.  When she came back and said, “I’m sorry, we can’t see you again,” that’s when the tears and the sobbing came.  She put me on hold again, then came back and said that they could take me after all, if I could come straight in, as the doctor was only in until noon.

Luckily, my regular OB and RE are about 2 minutes up the street from each other.  After waiting about 15 minutes or so, they brought me back in to the ultrasound room.  I practically had my pants off before the nurse shut the door. 

The doctor came in and as soon as he got the wand in, he said, “Everything is perfect.”  He started moving it around and then we saw the heartbeat blinking on the screen.  I started sobbing all over again, this time out of relief.  “In fact,” he asked, “you want to see something really cool?”  I was still so busy trying to dial back the freak out that I didn’t answer until he prompted, “Say ‘yes’.” 

And then he pointed out the two little arm buds growing, and as we were looking, the baby gave a little jump, as if it was waving and saying “Hi, mom!”

I go back next week for what was supposed to be my next regular 4 week OB visit (moved back a week because of the holidays, I wanted the reassurance of the hearing the heartbeat before telling the whole family at Christmas).  I’ll have another regular check up and an ultrasound with the tech then.

Just a few more weeks and hopefully I can relax a little bit more.  My S-I-L says the end of the first trimester is a big relief, and then at 28 weeks, it’s another big relief, because the baby is then viable if you deliver early. I’m not sure about that; 28 weeks seems barely half cooked to me.  I think the worrying is just beginning; I don’t think I’m going to relax for the rest of my life…


Spotting December 10, 2007

Filed under: ?Baby? — booksunread @ 1:28 pm

So, I’m freaking out over here.  I had some spotting late on Friday and then again yesterday morning.  It wasn’t anything very heavy-in fact, any lighter and it wouldn’t have been there at all.  But…this is how it started last time. And I am EXACTLY where I was in my pregnancy as last time. 

I have a message in to my doctor’s office and am waiting for them to open (in 33 minutes) and call me back.  I want to get in asap this morning for a check out and an ultrasound.