Books Unread, Jokes Untold-the pursuit of life

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Worst Parallel Parker, Ever November 3, 2008

Filed under: Daily Grind — booksunread @ 12:44 pm

The local Panera is located in a teeny strip mall, with a correspondingly teeny parking lot.  It wouldn’t be adequate if the strip mall only housed a few retail establishments; for a large multi-seat restaurant AND a Starbucks, it is ridiculously small. 
Yet I love me a you pick 2 combo so approximately once a week I head out and join the parade of cars circling the building, hoping for a spot to open up.  Yesterday, I was lucky enough to find a spot open when I arrived.  Unluckily, it was one of two parallel spots on the side of the building, and not the one on the end you can just pull into. No, it was the one wedged between another occupied spot and the iron railing fencing off the outdoor patio.
Gamely, I pulled past the spot, turned on my blinker and started trying to back into the spot. I had to  pause each time another car searching for a spot squeezed past me in the narrow lot, trying to gauge by my uncoordinated maneuvers whether I might be coming or going. 
I SERIOUSLY suck at parallel parking.  I grew up in suburbia, land of a million parking lots.  On top of that, I could not keep the car in a straight line in reverse if you put a gun to my head (as the lawn to either side of my driveway can attest).  So backing up while turning the wheels this way and that is usually beyond me unless the spot is ridiculously large to accommodate my inching forward and back, making minute adjustments for ten minutes before abandoning the car a foot from the curb (or parked on top of it).
I tried the pull past the spot maneuver three times, then I backed all the way up and tried to nose my way in, no dice.  All of this was witnessed by the other parkers, circling like sharks, rolling their eyes and waiting for me to just give it up already.  Fortunately, someone exited a regular spot then and put me out of my misery.  When I came out with my to go lunch, I saw that someone else had managed to jam their Ford Explorer into the spot.  Talk about feeling inadequate….


One Response to “Worst Parallel Parker, Ever”

  1. maybelle76 Says:

    Come visit me, I’ll teach you! I learned the day I moved into the city – my sister taught me and I was scared to death. Now it’s second nature and I laugh at the people in suburbia 🙂

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