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Bits and Pieces July 27, 2009

Filed under: Schmooper — booksunread @ 1:24 pm

So you know what really drives me irrationally bugshit crazy about having a kid? Missing parts of toys and games.  Up until now, it’s been the ever shrinking supply of binkies.  Which, while annoying, at least made sense-they get taken out of the house, they get dropped, they get left behind. 

With the toys, it is a hundred times more frustrating.  It’s just so illogical.  I know those motherfuckers have not been out of the house, so where the fuck is the pink stacking cup?!?  And the other half of the train magnet?!?  Occasionally, the missing piece can be located in the ficus pot where Squidgey has tucked it for safekeeping as he runs by in his Elmo-mobile.  But that pink cup has been missing for weeks. I have looked everywhere. Did he eat it? Did he flush it down the toilet when I wasn’t looking? I DON’T KNOW and it bugs the shit out of me.

I realize, of course, that I am setting myself up for a lifetime of twisted panties, because, this is what kids do-they loose shit.  I just hope I can suppress my mommy dearest compulsions and not be all “Squidgey, until you find that missing red matchbox car, you are grounded!”

In other bits of annoyingness, after a couple month honeymoon of beatific nap and bedtimes, Squidge has entered the phase of “being a shitbag bastard,” as we like to call it at our house. 

He’s been, for the most part, a pretty good baby about going to bed.  Never one that required hours of rocking and then you grit your teeth as you put him down, praying he doesn’t wake up again.  Usually once he was out, he was out with a minimum of fuss. Finish bottle, cuddle in, close eyes, dead to the world in 5 minutes.  Sure, we’ve gone through some phases where he starting waking again and we had to do the cry it out, but the last couple months, after a couple minutes of rocking, he’s drowsy enough to put him down and he rolls over, grabs his blanket and puts himself to sleep. 

Just recently he’s started hanging out quietly so you think he’s asleep, then going into full throttle protest mode.  It started with naps and just got progressively worse.  At first, he’d just talk to himself and tap his binky against the crib bars like a wee little inmate for about half an hour or so before drifting off.  Now, after the initial quiet, he’s started tossing his blanky and binky overboard, then being all “WAHHHH need binky and blanky!!!!”  Then you go in there, pick up the stuff, and attempt to rock him, whereupon he starts laughing and trying to yank your nose off.  So you dump him back in the crib and leave until his cries become truly woeful.  Then you go back in and attempt to get him down because you know there is no way he’s going to sleep sans binky.  It’s now an HOUR since you put him down.  Saturday he didn’t actually fall asleep for his afternoon nap, which usually starts between 12:30 and 1, until 3:30!

And then the last two nights, he’s been pulling the same shit at bedtime.  I’m at the, “I’m done with this, he can cry it out, binky or no binky,” stage.  Both at naptimes and bedtime, Miguel has been giving in and going in to rock him.  I can already tell this is going to be one of those times we’re not going to be on the same page.  He says we can’t force him to sleep. No, but we can train him to.  How did we finally get him to sleep through the night? WE STOPPED GOING IN THERE AND LET HIM CRY IT OUT. How did we get him to stop waking 45 minutes after bedtime? WE STOPPED GOING IN THERE AND LET HIM CRY IT OUT. 

Of course, the problem with this now is that it’s likely he no longer has his sleep crutches (binky and blanky) in his crib, which makes it less likely he’s going to give up and go to sleep. So I’ve advocated going back in, putting his shit back in the crib, but not picking him up or giving him the reward of any interaction.  Last night, Miguel went up to do this, but didn’t come back down for 20 minutes. When he returned, he reported that Squidgey still had his bink and blank, but was “just sad.” So he held him.  So I guess until he gets as sick of it as I am and is ready to let him cry it out, Miguel will be vice president in charge of rocking his ass to sleep.  I hope to god we pass through this stage soon.

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